No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Randomize
