You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
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