The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
