im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
