So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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