he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
