I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I just made out with a guy for $7.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Randomize
