Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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