If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
