I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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