i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
