i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
