"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
