Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
