why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
