Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I am naked and annoyed.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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