i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize