my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
