he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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