why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
