I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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