i just google imaged poop.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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