i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
