areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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