Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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