I think scott just propositioned me for sex
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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