I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I have already put on my inside pants.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
