we made out on top of his cat.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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