Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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