thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
