woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
