my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
