I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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