Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
