drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
false alarm. still invincible.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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