I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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