Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
