Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
