you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
