Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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