plz talk dirty to me
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Randomize