i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
