So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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