her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
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