i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
