you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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