I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
