I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Randomize
