I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
