he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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